Kogasa "Cumbrains" Spartacus @zorotl@monads.online

@RussellsBarbershopQuartet when i was a teen i got in trouble with my teacher for knowing who priapus was

@RussellsBarbershopQuartet all I can think of now is the term "Duck-Billed Priapus"

scientists: probably no one died while jacking off in pompeii

the romans: this is Priapus. he's the god of having a huge fucking boner. he was originally Greek but we loved him so much we adopted him as our own

pop that dicc on a handstand

haha, no but seriously fuck cops

idk who needs to hear this but you dont actually need to be the best at playing that video game you like. you can play it sub-optimally. you can even not finish it and still say you like it. you're free now

Finally a T-shirt that's offensive to everyone.

scientists try to tell me "it's just an effect of the instant pyroclastic rigor mortis" as if that proves that they weren't jacking it. frankly I find the idea that literally no one was masturbating in a city of 10,000 people kinda far fetched. statistically at least one of them was wanking when they died

if I ever hear "they died doing what they love" without any context, the thing my mind immediately jumps to is the guy who was jacking off at the exact moment Mt. Vesuvius destroyed Pompeii and who is now permanently fossilized mid-stroke

@flowless2 fertilizer spreader amirite

im streaming farming simulator 17 but it should be called bowel stimulator 2020

@flowless2 look at all this unpaid volunteer work we're making our employees do so they can have an hr department and a break room, where's our tax break?!

taking a break from my stream to take a shit, this is self care

c*mbia

chévere, which means cool in many spanish speaking countries, apparently refers to a glizzy in guatemala