sometimes i wonder how humans discovered which plants have medicinal properties or poisons or are tasty to eat and then i see that redditors will just order random chemicals on the internet and ingest them

@dankwraith if u ate something trying to survive but got so zonked that god starts speaking to u ud do it again

@dankwraith redditors? i associate this behavior with 25 year old dirtbags who have already tried all the regular drugs

@dankwraith I once managed to pad an otherwise excruciatingly boring paper on a PCR test to see who has what genes for tasting bitterness by suggesting that people who didn't taste bitterness would not necessarily be selected out, because they could readily consume plant alkaloids others couldn't stomach, so you'd get a split of people who would die off, and those who could be the bullshit evopsych version of the local weed dealer. I thought this was largely a throwaway idea that went nowhere but was likely to be well-received, and I was right, the professor thought it was great.

@dankwraith they really are providing a great service to humanity

@dankwraith you can make some sort of intelligent argument about how "well we observed other animals eating it and -"

the funnier impulse is when humans go

"this tastes like shit. I BET IT'S MEDICINE"

@wigglytuffitout @dankwraith there is a saying in some east asian cultures, particularly japan, that medicine has to be bitter or otherwise unpleasant tasting


so there's some merit to that

@extinct @dankwraith a bit less for the european shit i know better which is just a lot of

"oh my god this tastes terrible and it made me shit myself inside out. GUYS I FOUND MEDICINE"

@ancient_domains_of_word @extinct @dankwraith unless you are a victorian, in which case you are allergic to fun*. no funny berries for you! only these things that make you shit yourself inside out. because that's real medicine.

*can still somehow include weird fetishes about lady bicyclists, mind you. yes, i too am distressed i know about this subject

@wigglytuffitout @dankwraith also mercury, where they kept trying to find a disease it could cure because it looked too cool to not be good for you

@dankwraith i imagine redditors who will put anything in their mouths to get karma or clout or whatever the fuck they crave so bad has been an archetype of human since long before we ever logged onto the accursed internet

@dankwraith reading the other day about how penicillin was eventually isolated after a tip off that bedouins would rub saddle fungus in wounds and it worked as a disinfectant. Buckwild

@dankwraith the process I really marvel at is the elaborate preparation required to make certain things edible, like tapioca or (less popular) hakarl, and think about how dire the food situation must have been for such experiments to be worth the time

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