The biggest thing I had to learn in my transition is that cis people interpret gender expression like a bad AI
I'm "sir" when I wear a red sweater, but "ma'am" when I wear a green tunic. I'm "sir" when I talk in person but "ma'am" over the phone. I'm "sir" when my hair is pulled up but "ma'am" when I let it down.
And I get this is part of what people mean when they say gender is performative. I just hate that I have to dress and act as if I have a giant "WOMAN" label on me at all times to avoid being misgendered
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