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[Me, a pilot]: *smacking my metric altimeter* "show feet"

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I guess yuo could say my wife amd I have a "decentralized relationship".. .

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[Me, on OKCupid]: "hey ,cutie how long u lived in NY?"

[LadyLiberty69]: "I've been in the harbor since 1885..."

[Me]: "O cool, you've got really big feet lol, great for crushimg..."

[LadyLiberty]: *no response*

[Me, 2 days later]: "OH TOO GOOD TO REAPOND UR NOT EVEN HOT U BIG GREEN BITCJ UR COVERED IN PATINA!!"

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Crossing the Canadian border to take a shit on their land

are ears part of your face

Beautiful women of switter I will always be yuor shortking

Dudes probably tired and hungry as shit, having to defend his country (whatever it's faults [many]) from imperialists right at the border for half a century now and you think it's funny to get up in his business poking fun at him.

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Swiping through tinder and one woman has a picture of her standing haughtily smirking in front of a NK soldier at the DMZ. No thanks

The globalists have fukced my wife and left all kinds of round earth propagamda and kinky lingerie in my master bedroom

Gonna blast a warning shot up the project managers' bulbous asses

Lord help me I'm about to lose my shit on the general project manager

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Taking deep breathes so I don't freak out and get kicked off the job

personally i think all the guys in john wick are letting him win

some french billionaire died, hell yeah

Under Wotan's presidency, Mastodon has zero children in detention centers

Loki is staring up at a light and screaming. you know, like you do

"it's a faraday cage for my dick in case 5g gives it covid" i'm mad

Broh do you support our unionization effort cuz if you don't imma kiss you so hard broh

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monads.online

monads.online is a community for goth nerds, aka people who are interested in the intersections of math, art, programming, philosophy, and related topics. this does not include your techbro ass. we also enjoy a healthy amount of shitposting. if you are a techno-materialist, technocrat, or some flavor of capitalist, don't even bother applying. if you are interested in an account please fill out an application, detailing why you are interested in joining, what you have to bring to the community, and your prior, if any, accounts on the fediverse.